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Affairs & Divorce: Possible Good
From an Affair?:
1. Give thanks that you now know what is going on in your life; you are
no longer in the dark.
2. Your partner's behavior allows you to see that person in new, if
unpleasant ways.
3. Some affairs are intended to compensate for things that are missing in
the marriage. An affair can represent an indirect and clumsy effort to signal
the partner that all is not well in the relationship. If this is the case, the
betrayed party can newly assess the marriage and set up more direct
communication for any future marital issues.
4. One party does not cause the other to act out in any particular way,
such as violating the marital vows, but this terrible event can lead one to
reexamine who they are and who they really want to be. Just because the other
person has been terribly inappropriate does not mean that the victimized party
is therefore perfect and should not take this as opportunity to reassess their
own condition.
5. If there are problems in the relationship that can be fixed and that
one wants to repair, it is better for all family members that this is discovered
as soon as possible.
6. If the discovery of an affair means that one carefully decides to end
the marriage, the sooner this the better. Why live a lie? And why live a lie for
a longer period than necessary?
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